Saying Good-Bye

You all have vaguely been on an emotional roller coaster with me since day one or it might have been the 15th day.  During the course of this ride this one particular individual has resurfaced on several occasions.  There have been shouting matches, text blasts, no communication, make ups, tears shed, laughs, smiles and a host of other things.  This is the kind of thing that happens when you mix fire and air.  Together either it dies or the fire grows.  Let’s just say without proper management everything that you don’t want to happen can because sometimes things are simply out of your control.

After not speaking to this person for several months, I ran into him at a local night spot here in Detroit.  The same night my behind figured out I was exhausted with the entire club scene.  As I held up the wall my phone rang with the distinctive tone assigned to my siblings.  Through a text message the message was relayed – Your boyfriend is here!  Now we all know that I have been the poster girl for Single Women on The Move for a substantial amount of time, lol.  Not one to take information for face value until it meets my face.  I blew it off.  Then like  a beam of lightening he appeared.  Walking right over to me we hugged, said our pleasantries and stood among jovial people.  All the time that was lost between us didn’t matter.  It was what it was for that moment.  Then as the lights went up I escaped an inevitable night by making my way to the door without saying good-bye.

I was happy to see him.  He was okay! I decided at this moment it was time to let go of a 7 year relationship that left both of us angry with unanswered questions and regret.  The underlying factor that we were both ignoring in our selfishness was that maybe we should have just remained friends.  Our plans and attempts to be in a “traditional relationship” failed time after time.  We hadn’t come to the realization that we were NOT meant to be no matter how destined we felt.  In a short morning catch up, I expressed my true feelings about what we have, had, our future and wished him well on his journey through the remainder of his life.  In true mature fashion he did the same.  We vowed to always be friendly but we had to move on.  This was bigger than us and we agreed on those facts.

Saying good-bye to an experience that almost stretched a decade yet embodied most of our lives was hard.  Moreover, we knew it was t he thing to do.  As the text read “I love you… Always.”  The words are etched in my heart as if we had carved our love into one of the many trees throughout this great city.  It resides in a scared place.  Spoken from one of the most sincere men I’ve ever known in my time.

 

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